The holidays are upon us, and it can be a tough time if we’ve gone through the loss of our loved one.

Today I wanted to talk about how I deal with grief during the holidays. I want to share with you some things that have helped me during the past years and the years moving forward.

How to Cope with Grief During the Holidays Tip #1
My first tip to you is to look out and to see if there’s anybody else that doesn’t have a place to go on the holidays. When we invite those that don’t have family and friends that are alone into our homes, it helps us and fills our hearts to help others. We are all here in this world to love and serve other people. And when we do so, it makes us feel good.

How to Cope with Grief During the Holidays Tip #2
Tip number two is surround yourself with like-minded people. Be with your family that has also gone through that loss and then also surround yourself with friends that understand you. You know, some people that haven’t gone through loss in their life might not understand what you’re experiencing. When we can surround ourselves with others that have also gone through loss in their life it feels like we understand, we get each other, and what the beautiful thing is that we can each talk about our loved one that is no longer with us during the holidays.

How to Cope with Grief During the Holidays Tip #3
Tip number three is honor them. Welcome them in. You know, our loved ones that have passed over, they might not be here with us physically, we might not be able to see them, but they are always with us spiritually. And when we talk about them, when we honor them, and maybe do some of the traditions that we used do to with those loved ones, it feels like they’re there with us, and they are. They truly are. So what we can do is we can go around the table during Christmas time and share something that we’re truly grateful for and thankful for our loved ones. And especially the ones that have passed over. Share old memories, old stories, and have them there at the dinner table with you. You can do this.

How to Cope with Grief During the Holidays Tip #4
Have a tradition each year. After I lost my mom, this will be my seventh year without her, the first year I thought my Christmas was never going to be the same and I was never going to be truly happy and fulfilled again. What we did is we decided to have a campfire outside on Christmas Eve and honor my mother and our loved ones that have passed. It was so beautiful. The stars are right up in the sky, looking down upon us. And when we talk about our loved ones, they are there, and we’re sharing how much we cared for them.

My mom used to always tell me when I was a little girl because my dad passed away when I was two years old, she used to always say, daddy, ‘s in the stars. He is the brightest start in the sky. And to this day when I look up into the stars, I know my dad is watching down upon me. So create a tradition for yourself. Create a tradition where you’re able to create something new for your holiday season, and invite those that you love into that celebration as well. It’s a time to honor and love on each other and to be grateful for what we truly have.

I wish you a very beautiful holiday season. If you have any questions, comments, anything at all, please post in the comments below. I’m here to serve you and to support you. Just remember, you are exactly where you’re supposed to be, and my heart is always with you.

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Today, we’re going to talk about how to speak to a family member, a friend, or a co-worker about your grief. I’m going to share with you 5 tips today that can help you open up to others about your grief that you’ve experienced.

How To Talk About The Loss Of A Loved One #1
Tip number one: be patient with yourself. You don’t need to rush into talking about what you’ve just experienced. I would suggest taking one day at a time, and tapping into your heart and what feels right. If today feels like a good time to talk about your loved one that you’ve lost, then absolutely go for it, okay? But don’t feel like you need to be pressured into talking about it with others, okay? Grief is, you know, it’s different for everybody, so ask yourself what feels right.

How To Talk About The Loss Of A Loved One #2
Tip number two: I would suggest connecting with people that you feel safe with, that you feel connected with already, and comfortable with, so that could be like a close friend, a best friend, or a family member, and you know, talk about it amongst each other. Talk about it with others that have also been affected by this loss first, it’s a time for the two of you to connect with each other and to open up to your feelings, and when you can connect with each other about what you’re experiencing, it really is a healing, beautiful healing experience.

How To Talk About The Loss Of A Loved One #3
Tip number three is probably my favorite, speak your truth, be authentic, be yourself. There’s nothing wrong with showing your vulnerability to other people. Vulnerability is beautiful, so be you, be yourself. It’s okay whatever you’re experiencing. I loved what C.S Lewis said from A Grief Observed. He said, “Nobody ever told me grief felt so much like fear.” Isn’t that, that’s true, it is fearful. Going through grief is scary, there’s fear.

How To Talk About The Loss Of A Loved One #4
Number four: when you talk about your loss, it touches others. And you know it makes other people feel special that you’re opening up to them. So when you open up to say a boss, or a co-worker, or a family member about it, they’re going to feel good about themselves too, so you’re giving some love, and some opportunity to make the other person feel good. So people want to talk about it with you, but they’re just unsure of how to approach the subject or the situation.

How To Talk About The Loss Of A Loved One #5
That brings me to number five. Others sometimes don’t know what to say. So they could be there, waiting for you to come to them. So by speaking your truth, it will open up and give yourself permission to feel, and great things can happen and manifest from this. You know, it really can, grief can either bring people together, or it can disconnect relationships. So really, I encourage you to go out there, really tap in to like what your heart is saying, and where, where your heart is guiding you. Just speak your truth, okay?

This time is difficult, but know that you’re going to get through this, and everything’s going to be okay. Speak from your heart, and don’t let your loved ones that have passed away be forgotten, okay?

So you know, speaking about them keeps them alive and a part of your life. You know, as long as you’re living, your loved one that has passed is always going to be a part of your life, so talk about them, and talk about them often. I talk about my loved ones all the time that have transitioned, and I know that my Mom is right here with me along my journey. Just be yourself, be open, and come from your heart.

When we grieve, we feel lost, we feel empty, we feel alone, and we need somebody there to be there for us. I’m going to share with you 10 ways to help a friend in grief. If your friend has just lost a loved one, then they need you. They need you there; they need your support.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #1
The first thing that I would love for you to do for them is to be fully present. Show up and be present with your friend. That’s all that they need; they need you there. Just go over to their house, show up, and be present with them so that they can be in their pain.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #2
Number two: talk about their loved one that died. Don’t ignore what happened, their loved one has just passed away, and they’re now gone. They want to talk about it. Ask your friend that’s in grief, would you like to talk about what happened.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #3
Number three: listen more, and talk less. Let them do the talking; you’re there to listen to them. Just be there, and be an ear for them. Listen to whatever they have to say, and support them.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #4
Number four: tell stories about their loved one that has passed. And it could be something that their loved one did to impact your life. It makes your friend feel good. They want to talk about their loved one that has passed. They want to hear stories about them.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #5
Number five: bring them comforting remedies. When I went through all of my loss, my best friend, she came over, she brought me essential oils, she brought me bubble bath, and tea, and certain things like that, things that I would use on a daily basis, even candles.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #6
Number six: ask them if you can make phone calls for them or even send out emails to friends of the family or other people that need to know and be notified that that person has passed. Because when we go through the loss of a loved one, we are overwhelmed, we can’t even think clearly, and we feel temporarily crazy.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #7
Number seven is don’t fix them. They don’t need to be fixed. They are in grief; they are feeling not themselves at all. They will not be acting like the way that they normally act. They are going to be confused, lost, overwhelmed, in deep sadness.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #8
Number eight is let them be in their pain. Don’t try to tell them to stop crying; they need to feel it. If they are crying or they need to scream or get angry, or anything, let them be in their pain, mm-kay? Let them feel it. To heal, we need to feel. Know that it’s okay if they’re feeling that way.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #9
Number nine is this is not about you; it’s about them. If they are maybe getting frustrated with you, or they could be taking out their emotions on you, but know that’s it’s not about you, it’s what they’re experiencing. Don’t feel any hurt, like you’re a bad person or a bad friend. You are doing the best that you can do, and know that, okay? This isn’t about you, this is about them and being in their grief.

Ways To Help A Friend In Grief #10
Number 10, all you need to do is love them, love them. Show them love, bring love, be the friend that you are. Show up with an open heart. Just go with the flow, and be present for them. They need you right now. They need you to be there in the most difficult time in their life.

Grief isn’t easy, and because that they have you, they are going to be comforted in such a big way. Be the best friend that you can be. Love with your full heart; you are going to do great. If you have any questions or comments, Please post them down below. I am here to serve you and to help you help your friend in grief.

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Is it possible to find peace and fulfillment again after the loss of a loved one?

How can you work toward moving forward after a loss? It is a little bit of a challenge. We’re unsure of how to move forward. I would like to share with you like 5 tips for moving forward after loss.

Tips For Moving Forward After Loss #1
We need to feel our emotions to heal. And this needs to be done with full capacity, okay? And don’t suppress any of your emotions. I encourage you to let it all out, and the thing is, is with grief, it sneaks up on you when you least expect it. And I’m sure that you can, you understand this as well. You know, you’ll be at a grocery store, and you might see your loved one’s favorite drink or favorite food, or even if a song starts to play and then it’s called grief triggers. And so they come up all the time. We need to feel those emotions in order to heal. When something like this happens, I would encourage you to take a step back or even go to your car and feel into it.

Tips For Moving Forward After Loss #2
Our thoughts create reality. Everything that we are thinking within ourselves is what we’re putting out there into the universe. And whatever we’re thinking is what we’re going to attract. Stand guard to the door of your mind, as Jim Rohn says. Be aware of what you’re thinking. Is it negative thoughts, or is it positive thoughts, or is it neutral thoughts? Really, it’s important that we have a powerful context. We could wake up, and it could be a really rainy, gloomy day, and when we look outside, and we see that rain coming down, and it’s dark and gloomy. We’re like, oh this is going to be an awful day today. Or we can say, oh my gosh it’s raining today, what a beautiful day to curl up on the couch and read a book.

Tips For Moving Forward After Loss #3
Surrender. Fully surrender to the universe. And I love my mentor and spiritual teacher Gabby Bernstein. She says, when you think you’ve surrendered, surrender more. You can never surrender enough. Okay, and I’m telling you, if you need to get down on your knees and surrender, then do that. Ask the higher power, God, universe, your angels, whatever you believe in for help. And fully surrender into what is. Ask them for help, they will help you, but you have to believe in that. You have to truly believe within yourself that you are going to surrender and that you are going to have guidance, ‘kay? It’s powerful, and this is powerful stuff. ‘

Tips For Moving Forward After Loss #4
Surround yourself with people that you love and trust. Connection is everything, and I know that when we are grieving, we tend to separate ourselves from others, but what we most need is people that we can trust and love on us and feel a connection. And that will uplift us, inspire us. Or people that will just let us express ourselves, our authentic selves, right? Having a like-minded community of women, or men, or whatever that is. A community of people where you feel like you belong. That you feel like understand where you’re coming from. It could even be a friend that lost somebody as well, and you feel a connection with them. Surround yourself with people that you love and trust, ‘kay?

Tips For Moving Forward After Loss #5
Think about and honor your loved one every single day. Don’t hide from this. Every morning you might want to wake up and look at the picture of your loved one that is no longer with you, and take a moment and look at the picture, and be like, you know what, I’m so grateful for how long I had you in my life. I love you, and I miss you, I know you’re here with me. Honor them, they are with you in spirit, and they want to see you live your life. They don’t want to see you suffer and be sad.

I hope some of these 5 vital tips have served you well, and I would love to hear from you.

Any comments, anything that you would like to say, please post down below, I’m here to serve and love you.

Grief is a process. It takes some time to move through the steps and on to our healing journey.

I am so excited to be here with you today. And today I’m going to be sharing with you 5 subtle signs that you need grief coaching.

#1 Signs You Need Grief Coaching 
You feel lost. You might not know who you are anymore. Not only did you lose your loved one, but you lost a piece of yourself, and there could be this big hole in your heart, and you’re really not sure where to go, what to do, or who you even are anymore. You will never be that same person that you were when your loved one was alive. You are now a completely different person, so who are you? Are you asking yourself that?

#2 Signs You Need Grief Coaching 
You’re suppressing your emotions. Do you find yourself holding your tears back, not wanting to move through the feelings you’re feeling? Do you bottle everything up and put on the “I’m fine” face on for everybody else? Do you feel that tension in your core and you don’t want to release those feelings because you’re not sure how you’re going to be able to handle it? Do you suppress your emotions by drinking alcohol, taking prescription medication to numb the pain, or even taking drugs? This is common for most of us that go through the grieving process we try to numb out and not feel all the feelings. But it is crucial that we feel all of those feelings. If we do not feel our emotions, we will never heal. So be aware of that, are you suppressing all of your emotions.

#3 Signs You Need Grief Coaching 
You’re separating yourself from others. Do you find yourself wanting to stay at home, be by yourself, not wanting to go to those social gatherings or going out for that cup of coffee with a friend, that you do not want to socialize at all or feel a connection with others? You want to be by yourself. This is common, so don’t worry. But it’s important that we break through this because connection is everything in life. So if you find yourself separating yourself from others, be aware of that.

#4 Signs You Need Grief Coaching 
Your health is in jeopardy. When we are grieving, our immune system is already low. We are trying to survive, and you know sometimes we’re either not eating, or we’re eating too much. And a lot of the time we tend not to eat the right foods when we’re grieving. It’s really important that we’re fuelling our bodies with the nutrients that it needs to go through our healing process. If you are not eating the right foods and you’re not doing physical activity that’s something to be aware of. If we don’t have our health in life, we have nothing, okay. And you are important. This vessel is holding your spirit, so be aware of that.

#5 Signs You Need Grief Coaching 
Your relationships are suffering and I see this all the time. Marriages break, families fall apart, friendships are lost. If your relationships are suffering, please be aware of this, this is not healthy. Grief affects our entire life. It affects our job, and it affects our spirituality, it affects our relationships, our health.

Just know that if you’re experiencing these five signs, this might be something for you to think about. You are not alone in this, and you don’t have to be. So if you have any questions at all I would love to hear from you.

I would love your feedback, please post in the comments below, and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

I am bringing you something incredible!

This is something I’m so passionate about because our loved ones that have transitioned, they’re always trying to look for ways to connect with us. And the more conscious we are, the more we will see them show up in these 5 different ways that I’m going to be sharing with you right now.

#1 Signs A Deceased Loved One Is Near 
Our senses seem to be more intense. So this could be sound, touch, taste, smell. So for example, all of a sudden you have this strong scent of your loved one’s perfume or cologne, and you could be walking through your house and then it’s like they just sprayed it. That is them sending you a sign that they’re there, that they’re supporting you. And this happens to me all the time. I feel like my mom is just spraying her perfume and I’m walking right through it, and I’m like, oh hi mom. Pretty cool.

#2 Signs A Deceased Loved One Is Near 
Number two is that our electronics suddenly malfunction. This could be like they’re not working, they’re not turning on, and then they’ll go completely dead or then all of a sudden they work. Or it could be the radio. They could even actually come through the radio and whisper something to you. Or they might even send you a song. Maybe it’s the favorite song that they loved or a song that the two of you shared.

#3 Signs A Deceased Loved One Is Near 
Number three is you feel them. You feel their presence. You can’t see them, but you feel them. You might even feel them touching and brushing the side of your cheek, or maybe they went by you, and you felt them gaze across your arm. You could even feel like a cold breeze like a draft that you feel like there’s a window open and then it’s just a whoosh of a cold breeze. That is them showing you that they are there.

#4 Signs A Deceased Loved One Is Near 
Number four is dreams, and this happens all the time. I have multiple visits from my loved ones in my dreams. And before I go to sleep and I’m looking for a message, maybe I want to communicate with them, I ask them before I go to sleep and I say, “Please come into my dream. I need some guidance.”

#5 Signs A Deceased Loved One Is Near 
Number five is universal signs. This happens all the time. On my wedding day I actually stood up, and I made a speech, and I said to everyone I said, “My mother and father they are not here in the physical form, but they are here spiritually.” And when I was a little girl, I asked my mom if she would walk me down the aisle to Somewhere Over the Rainbow, the song. Well, all of a sudden everybody was gasping. I turned around, and I had a double rainbow. It was the perfect double rainbow I have ever seen, and that was the gift from my parents on my wedding day. Spirit is always trying to connect with us.

5:55 Be aware of these 5 different signs I just shared with you today, and I would love to hear from you. What signs from spirit do you get? Please share down below in the comments. What shows up for you? Is it butterflies? Is it rainbows? Do they come through on the radio? What is it that you receive from spirit?

I know how hard grief is to move through, today I’m sharing five practices that will help you navigate the pain and head out on Your Healing Journey.

These are all the practices that I have incorporated into my life and my daily routine.

#1: Gratitude
Immediately when I wake up in the morning, I don’t get out of bed. I wake up, and I lie there, and I put my hands on my heart, and I think of three things that I am truly grateful for. Just three things. And you know, it can be as simple as I am grateful for the pillow that my head is lying on. I am grateful for the bed that I am in. I am grateful for the sleep that I had. You know, really anything. But like truly tap into it. Like sometimes I’ll find myself moving into emotion. And, you know, some tears will come because I’m just so grateful. I mean waking up every day is a gift. So think of three things that you are truly grateful for.

2: Meditation and Breath Work
Meditation has transformed my life. And by starting with like three to five minutes a day, it’s a wonderful way to start this practice. You know, eventually, you could start meditating for around 45 minutes to an hour, and you know, even practicing it multiple times per day. Like I personally always start my day out with meditation. And then I’ll do like a mid-day meditation and then at night I go to sleep with meditation because it helps guide me into a deep sleep. I love this quote by Gandhi, “In the attitude of silence “the soul finds the path in a clearer light. “And what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself “into crystal clearness.” So meditation is wonderful to like just silence the mind. You know, get all of the garbage out of there, really, and focus on your breath. And focus on our prana, which is our life force.

#3: Journaling
Always get your thoughts down in your journal every single day. It just helps clear your mind, cleanse your mind, and it’s a beautiful practice because you know, actually down the road you’ll go back, and you’ll read your journal and be proud of how far you’ve come. The healing journey is a process. There’s going to be good days. There’s going to be bad days. There’s going to be days where you just had enough. There’s going to be days where you think you’re doing it, you feel good, and journaling is crucial. I do my journal every single day. So get yourself a journal. It’s a form of therapy.

#4: Exercise
Motion creates emotion, and Tony Robbins talks about this all the time. He says that bad physiology reinforces negative feelings. Changing your physiology means changing your mental state and breaking your negative patterns. Great physiology, therefore, leads to great emotions and that is one of the keys to getting unstuck. By just doing about 10 to 20 minutes of movement, exercise a day, it will help you with your grieving process.

#5 Affirmations
When we start to say affirmations, we end up creating what we would like to have in our lives and how we would want to feel. So you know, by saying I am courageous, I am strong, I am healing, I am exactly where I’m supposed to be, I am on my way to transformation. To be honest, I actually do affirmations all the time, and you know, when I’m really trying to feel a certain way, I’ll actually take one of those markers and I’ll write it on my mirror in the washroom so when I’m getting ready I’m seeing, I am healing or I am courageous, or I am heading on the right path.

These 5 Powerful Ways To Deal With Grief have changed my life, they’ve changed my clients’ lives, and I encourage you to try one tomorrow. Maybe not do all five right away, but try one, you know? One step at a time, that’s all it takes.

Part 1:

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and as you all know I am very passionate about raising awareness around the BRCA Gene Mutation and Breast Cancer.

I have the honour of interviewing my friend Sharon Newman who has a remarkable story. Sharon carries the BRCA 2 Gene Mutation and while she was in the middle of a study at Women’s College Hospital she discovered she had Breast Cancer.

I encourage you to watch these videos closely and share them with your family and friends. Our health is so important and if we don’t have our health what do we really have?

Please ask any questions you may have down below about the BRCA Gene Mutations or Breast Cancer.

Part 2 will be this upcoming Monday, October 15th at 12pm EST.

Share these videos on your personal facebook pages to help raise awareness:)

Growing Through Grief LIVE with Lesslee Belmore on Health & Breast Cancer.